J. B. Priestley

"She was a handsome woman of forty-five and would remain so for many years."

Thomas A. Edison

"The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around."

Joseph Conrad

"Being a woman is a terribly difficult task, since it consists principally in dealing with men."

Amy Sedaris

"My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper."

Tallulah Bankhead

"If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner."

Calvin Trillin

"I never eat in a restaurant that's over a hundred feet off the ground and won't stand still."

Woody Allen

"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once."